Social media might be more harmful to your mental health than you think!
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How many times have you caught yourself scrolling endlessly through your phone? A quick check on social media often turns into a session, whether you’re locked up in the library studying for that midterm, taking a lunch break, or attempting to go to sleep at night. Social media is fun. No matter where we are, we can transport ourselves into the lives of others. We are connected like never before to the world around us. But as important as social media is, how healthy is our dependence on it? With every login, we are bombarded with the social standings of others. From a friend’s new job promotion, to the 20 pounds that one celebrity dropped, it sets the stage for comparing someone else’s progress to ours (while tending to forget our own). This is human nature, but it can also result in an unhealthy impact on self-esteem, anxiety and our happiness.
Leon Festinger came up with the Social Comparison Theory in 1954. According to Psychology Today, this theory states “we determine our own social and personal worth based on how we stack up against others”. As a result, we are constantly evaluating ourselves across a variety of domains (for example, attractiveness, wealth, intelligence, and success).” Social media facilitates this social comparison which leaves us feeling inadequate in terms of body image, wealth, social circles, and much more. This establishes unrealistic expectations of what our own lives should look like, in contrast to the people we see around us. Natascha Santos, a psychologist and assistant professor at NYU, states “you might process photos, Tweets, and posts in a way that glamorizes the lives of others, which may or may not be what they seem. This negative bias can lead you to minimize the positives of your own relationships when held up in comparison to relationships presented to you through a set of photos and carefully crafted status updates.” Self-comparison by way of social media not only establishes distorted expectations for ourselves, but takes away from the good things we already have going.
We are all prone to self-comparison. It’s not a bad thing, but when we excessively contrast what others have to what we have, it creates a field of insecurity. Here are some healthy ways to deal with self-comparison and use it to your advantage:
- Accept yourself for where you are right now. As college students, it’s unrealistic to compare your life to someone living their dream when we’re gearing up for ours. Life is progressive, and no one but yourself has the right to hold you to a standard. Just make sure that standard is realistic and not discouraging. Focus on your achievements- make a list. Even though there will always be someone ahead of you, that shouldn’t invalidate how far you’ve come.
- Be realistic. We take to social media to document the highlights (or the picture that turned out the best!). People’s social media accounts are, as Santos said, “carefully crafted”, and it seems like the goal to get the most affirmation. However, social media doesn’t show us the other side of things, where we carry out our day normally and often uneventfully. Remember to look at the bigger picture, and avoid the idealization of others.
- Try limiting your social media intake. It’s surprisingly refreshing not feeling the compulsive need to reply back or check on updates. I recently went without a phone for two weeks, and while not being in the loop was a disadvantage, it relieved a lot of anxiousness that comes with constantly keeping up with a phone. Social media is awesome, but everything is better in moderation.
- Recognize your own self worth. By looking at all the people we mistakenly perceive as better than us, we tend to mask our own unique and valuable qualities. Everyone is so different for so many reasons. We all have come a long way to get where we are right now, and that’s all that matters. If anything, derive inspiration the people you look up to and use it as motivation to support yourself in your endeavors.
No one is 100% themselves when it comes to portraying their lives on social media. There’s this great quote that goes, “stop comparing your behind the scenes with everyone else’s highlight reel”. By detaching real people from their glamorized social media accounts, it creates a lot of misperception about how people live their lives, and this can create bad feelings about oneself. The important thing is to be comfortable on your own track and own every step of the way.